My husband of three years and I share join custody of my 10 year old stepdaughter with my husband's ex. I have always tried to maintain a good relationship with the mom so that our families are not torn apart(flowers on mothers day etc etc). This has been difficult but I have persevered.
This is what just worked for me. I trained my 24 month old son to poo on the potty in three days and it took six weeks for him to be fully potty trained. That means naps and out during the day but still in diapers at night for a little while.
The joys of being the parents to 2 children are insurmountable, however, the need for a break to spend time with just you and your partner is not only wanted but a necessity for a healthy and happy family.Me and my husband are in exactly the same position as you and have found ways to keep the r